duologs | [ OPEN ] - Catch-All for Vash

[ Vash doesn't think he's ever really going to "settle in", even here. Everything in his life so far has been temporary, a few days or years of stolen time before all of it is swept away again - but even despite that, he's curious.

Everything about this world is different from No Man's Land. The humans here still suffer sometimes, and still want for things, but it's no endless desert, hostile to their very existence. It seems overwhelmingly abundant, without the need for a single Plant to provide anything.

He's still wandering around a little wide-eyed, so he doesn't really intend to end up in the library, but he decides to go in anyway. Ship Five's library had been a closet in comparison, containing physical copies of only the books that couldn't be replicated in digital format - religious texts, mostly. This place is overwhelming - he doesn't really know where to start, and he doesn't want to bother anyone to ask silly questions.

He tries to be unobtrusive as he moves past a young woman settled in the corner, but he isn't exactly stealthy wearing a bright red coat and an utterly lost expression. When she barks at him, Vash scrambles back, giving her room. ]

Sorry miss, I didn't mean to startle you. [ He's already holding his hands up in a placating gesture. ] I was just curious about what you were reading. You look very invested. Is it good?

[Immediate suspicion. Her eyes rake from the gaudy cape to the spiky hair, the earrings, to the puppy dog expression on his rather charming face. Sweet, but obnoxiously so, and clearly desperate for attention. What kind of guy walks around dressed like a cyberpunk Red Riding Hood? As if he's here scavenging for literature. He must think she's an easy mark.]

Oh. You can read? [Fukawa scoffs.] That's a surprise. F-from the look of you I'd say you haven't touched a book since you were five.

[Still, she turns the novel over to show him the cover: One Hundred Years of Solitude.]

I w-wouldn't bother with this one. The picture book section is three shelves over. Go sniff up some other girl's skirt.

[ Vash knows that expression, that sort of body language, all too well. He's seen it thousands of times. She's judging him, and she immediately finds him wanting.

Vash actually flinches, his shoulders hunched in to make himself look a little bit smaller, his eyes going a little misty and tearful without his glasses to hide behind. He lowers his hands. If he was a puppy dog before, now he's a kicked puppy dog.

He dismisses the expression as quickly as he can and tries to smile, rubbing the back of his neck. ]

That's a little harsh, don't you think? Although, I guess you're not wrong... It's been a long time.

[ It's not even the insults directed at him, really, that he finds most upsetting. He's got a pretty good idea of what someone needs to go through to respond to an earnest question with that much hostility and suspicion - with the accusation that he wants something from her. She must have really gone through it.

There are always people who are just mean for the sake of it, but he doesn't think that's true of this particular girl - he doesn't know her, so how can he assume that?

He reads the title of the book in her hands, something serious flickering in his expression. One Hundred Years of Solitude, huh. It's too bad - maybe they have something in common. ]

I'll leave you alone, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bothered you. Although, uh... Do you know where to find another copy of that one? [ He points at the book in her hands and smiles. ] You know, maybe one with pictures? [ He's joking please like him. ]

[Fukawa's brows rise as he withers before her. Is that all it took to cow him? Weak.]

Well what did you expect? Th-that I'd drop my panties for you right here and now? [Men. Honestly. They're so transparent it's embarrassing.] I m-may be ugly, but that doesn't make me desperate enough to fall for half-assed come-ons.

[Though now he keeps on about the book. She squints. This could be a ploy to lead her to a second location. Ha! Like she'd fall for that!

But then he'd phrased as if he just needed directions. And there had been more than one copy. Her mouth purses into a prim line. Her eyes spear him through.]

Why this book? Are you into magic realism? The cycle of time and inevitability of repeating the past?

The other one m-might have some illustrations but only because some classics are re-released with embellishments. Having pictures doesn't make it a text for novices. Why do you think you deserve to read one of the g-greatest achievements in Latin American literature?

[ Vash isn't meeting her gaze; there's a slight flush on his cheeks, but it isn't embarrassment. There's something hard and unreadable lingering in his expression that he doesn't want her to see. Is that what she thinks of herself? Only worth talking to for whatever it is someone might want to take from her?

He doesn't say anything about it either way. He deliberately avoids addressing the crude comments at all. There aren't a lot of ways it would go well even if he tried to reassure her that it wasn't what he was here for. She doesn't have any reason to trust him.

He's quiet after she finishes speaking, considering. He doesn't know what magic realism is. He only sort of understands that Latin America is a place that sounds vaguely familiar. But the cycle of time and repeating the past... That part he understands all too well. Maybe she does, too. ]

Well, I saw the title and... [ He meets her gaze directly for the first time since the whole interaction started. Despite the odd intensity of his expression, his voice remains soft: ] I felt like I could understand. That's why people are drawn to this kind of thing, right?

[ He smiles again, smaller this time. ] Maybe you're right, and I don't get it. What is it that makes someone deserving?

[This is the part where people start squawking or start jabbing. It's either, "I didn't mean it like that!" or "As if I would hit on an uggo like you." Paraphrased, but the sentiments were always the same.

Except he says nothing. Goes a little steely even, but not in a sense of embarrassment or shame. Though...he's flushed?

Fukawa frowns. When she writes characters they blossom beneath her fingertips, and readers the world over pen her letters about how they've never felt so seen. But when she speaks to people she sees them through thick gauze, their words muffled. She's taken enough jabs to expect cruelty, but otherwise floats in a mist. It's a curse of sorts: she has all the wisdom of the human experience but none of the practical skills to parse it. Paper was more malleable than people, and plainer still to comprehend.

She holds her tongue for a beat.]

...Were you locked up in a prison or something?

[It would be a tamer story than most people give her. She's tired of finding out so and so has the strength of ten men and wrestled dragons in their spare time. This multi-versal madness is exhausting.]

I j-just — you shouldn't approach books so casually. It's not like television, it's not just mindless fluff to pass the time and let your youth slip away. And so many people just want to seem well read without p-putting in any of the effort. It's revolting! And disrespectful! Using the work as a prop to m-make yourself look better. Or tossing it away the second the book gets too hard. I can't stand those wishy-washy types. If you want to read, embrace the b-book whole-heartedly! Even if you don't like it, do it the service of finishing it and decide what you think then.

So — [Here now, when did she start sitting up straighter? Meeting his eye with something more palatable than disdain?] If you're b-being drawn to this one, why? What was it about the title that drew you in: the time, or the solitude?

I... [ Despite himself, Vash is a little caught out by the question. Maybe the answer is obvious on his face, before he starts to dismiss it.

He thinks of scratching tally marks into the walls on Ship Three. That wasn't a prison. They had fed him and looked after him. He's been in real jail cells since then. He doesn't mean to make it sound like something it's not.

He's relieved when the young woman continues on her own. Her answer is interesting too, and well thought out. Vash sinks into an easy crouch, his arms resting across his thighs so she doesn't have to keep craning her neck up to look at him. He nods along at certain points, encouraging her to continue. No wonder she'd been so suspicious - he supposes he sounds like all the rest of these people, being flippant about something she clearly cares about.

When she pauses, his expression remains serious as he considers his answer. He feels like he owes her something more than brushing her off, even if he doesn't want to explain some things. ]

Where I come from... It's not like here. It's a harsh place where it's difficult to survive. I've heard it called a lot of things - I don't know if it's a prison or a purgatory, but I know why people feel like it is. Sometimes desert and sky are all you can see in every direction, and between the two of them - you feel like nothing. Like if you prayed to a god, you'd be wasting your last breath.

A hundred years is a long time to feel like that... but maybe there's something in this book, at the end of it. I'd like to find out. Or maybe I won't like what I find. [ He flashes her another small, tentative smile. ] But I'd have to read until the end if I wanted to know.

[ He inclines his head toward her again. ] I don't know this book like you do, though. Why are you drawn to it?

[Once again he unseats her expectations. There's almost a retreat of sorts, then a crouch. Better to meet her eye, better to put her at ease. Which she most definitely is not, thank you, she's not so easily swayed by bastards in bullshit clothing. She would not make concessions, no matter what sob story they pitch her.

That line about prayer, though. How infuriating that it's actually good. He must have stolen it from someone else.]

A huge desert? L-like the Sahara? [Earth reference. And nothing she could confirm herself. Do people live very far into that desert? She grunts and hitches her shoulders.] Nevermind. It's gonna be some godforsaken death trap I'll have never heard of, isn't it?

[The multi-verse continues to chafe. She sighs and adjusts her glasses, toying with the corner of the hardcover.]

I d-don't think it's what you're looking for. It's a c-critique of Latin American society and its elites under the veil of magical realism, among other things. It follows a family in a small village through several generations, who continue to repeat the mistakes of their predecessors because they cannot bear to impart unflattering wisdom. Ultimately their hubris and the advent of modernization and global influence ends in the total dissolution of their town and their family, and their legacy is wiped from the face of the earth.

[Her eyes flick to his. Very brief, she can't stand this oddly potent gaze of his. It's like he's trying to beam something from his iris to hers.]

And even that's over-simplifying it. [She picks a little harder at the corner. It's already been frayed, and her nervous fingers tease up the finish.]

I know this b-book because I'm a writer, obviously. You'd have to be a humongous idiot to not study the great works of your field.

[Not that she'd been studying anything just now. Fishing for easy distractions more like. Her lip curls.

She pushes the book into his hand.]

Just take it already. Maybe you'll l-learn something. Fill up that vacant head of yours.

[ Vash nods slowly. He doesn't really know what the Sahara is, but her description of No Man's Land as "some godforsaken death trap she's never heard of" doesn't exactly miss the mark.

He listens as she talks about the book, head tilted a little to the side, brow furrowed as he puzzles past the context he's missing. It sounds like a book Nai would like, Vash thinks. Something about how humans can't and won't change unless change comes for them.

When she says she's a writer, Vash's eyes light up with interest. He'd promised to stop bothering her, but he has a dozen more questions now.

He reflexively reaches for the book with his left hand when she shoves it at him so suddenly and unexpectedly - the positioning of his hand is wrong, like he's expecting to defend against a sudden attack, his body suddenly tense, so he fumbles with it a moment as it slips out of the grasp of his prosthetic.

He manages to catch it, though, exhaling slowly before he draws it back to rest against his knees. He smooths out any pages that have gotten a little wrinkled and runs a hand over the cover. ]

A-Are you sure - the one you're reading? That's kind of you. [ Vash hits her with his big blue eyes the size of dinner plates. ] Can I see the ones you've written sometime? When I finish this one? What do you write about?

[The fumble catches her by surprise, but it's the gleam off his hand that has her blinking wide. Oh, shit. He's got a prosthetic arm? How did she not notice that? Observation is supposed to be a writer's strongest suit and here she is, skating over features so obvious they could be lit by a flashing marquee. Maybe she'd been too wrapped up in that tacky ass coat and undercut, or those punk earrings, the dopey smile.

God. Now she looks like a huge asshole, shoving things at an amputee. Fukawa retreats into a hunch and her eyes dart around. Was anyone watching just now?

What good luck, they're alone. Whatever thin apology she'd mustered slides back down her throat, and Fukawa lets the moment stand as is. She didn't mean anything and he caught it anyway. That makes it even, surely. Right?]

I've already read it! [She snaps, cheeks blooming with blotches of pink. Her flush never came in evenly, always in virulent patches over cheek, neck, and collar alike.] Why do you think I can give that kind of synopsis in the first place? Just t-take it and stop being weird.

[Fukawa reaches for the next book in the pile.]

And...and m-my work isn't here anyway! So don't bother looking for it! You'd have no use for it in the f-first place. [Don't make her say her genre out loud. She can't take any more of this humiliation. She cringes back into her seat and opens the new book. The title seems to be Persuasion. Hard to tell when it's upside-down.] Why are you s-so damn nosy about everything? You've weaseled so much out of me and all I know is th-that you grew up in a shitty desert hellscape.

[ He takes it and continues being weird.

Despite all of her defensive barbs, she seems nice. She took the time to explain the book to him, and even gave him the copy she was reading. ]

That's too bad. I'd like to hear about your work sometime - maybe we can talk again? [ He pushes himself to his feet and holds out his hand to her. ] I'm Vash. It was nice meeting you miss..?

[ Is he trying to escape because she asked him to talk about himself? Yes. ]

[Oh my god why]

D-don't lie to my face! It wasn't nice at all!

[Fukawa cringes even further back. No, she will not take his hand. She's busy white-knuckling her upside-down Jane Austen. How can she give him her name now? What if he looks her up later? Worse still, what if he does find her work? This false life has folded her into a shameless online troglodyte who wastes her talents on fanfiction (shuddering, the horror), so while unlikely it's not an unwarranted fear. Can the flimsy veil of an online pseudonym protect her?

She's completely red now. She mashes the book into her face.]

J-j-just go already! Shoo! Shoo!

[ Vash drops his hand. He considers telling her that her book is upside down, just to be nice, but he decides it's better to pretend he doesn't notice it. He doesn't think she'll take it well.

Still, he pauses. He wants to reassure her, instinctively, but maybe he owes her just a little bit of honesty, after everything. ]

Well... Maybe it didn't have to be nice. [ His smile fades a little, but at the same time - the expression is more genuine. ] I appreciated it, anyway.

[ And before he can further outstay his welcome, Vash waves at her, already turning to head the other way. ] I'll bring this back to you when I'm done!

[ Sorry, you're not getting rid of him that easily Fukawa. ]

[She'd probably die if he pointed her folly out right now, so it's for the best.]

What?! D-don't bring it back to me! [Fukawa rises in her seat, gasping at his retreating back.] It's a library book you ingrate!

[BRING IT TO THE FRONT DESK LIKE A NORMAL PERSON.

She scowls in his wake, she festers. Her fingers dent the soft cover edition of Persuasion. Whatever. He won't find her again. Surely. She didn't give her name, and she's so forgettable, and he's clearly oh-so-stupid. Everything will be okay.

Yes. Verily.]

KDRAMA-RAMA

[ Vash was just here to deliver coffee and suddenly he finds himself shoved in front of bright studio lighting across from his new scene partner, a script still clutched tightly in his hands. He looks like a deer in headlights. He's been cast as a long lost twin..?

Desperately: ] Aren't twins supposed to look alike..? We don't look alike, right?

[ Please get him out of here. Scene partner, you're his only hope. ]

ROOMBA OF DOOMBA

[ While most people with any kind of good sense will run away from the obvious danger of a giant robot on the loose, Vash is of course running towards it. If he sees anyone who looks like they aren't a civilian, he stops to ask them: Hey, do you know which streets are the least populated? Can you help me clear people out?

Once he has some directions, he takes out his revolver and gets to work on those streets, shooting out the base of a lamp post or a support structure on the vendor cart, spilling cabbages everywhere. If he sees anyone nearby, he'll help them or encourage them to flee. He's careful to make sure there's no one in the path of destruction, but he is making the mess a lot worse. Maybe you want to put a stop to this? Or maybe you've figured out his plan and you're willing to help out? If anyone decides to go the ask questions first, attack later route, he's happy to tell them what he's trying to do: he wants to lead the thing out of the city while keeping it off the main streets.

Once he's directly in its path, the machine pauses briefly to scan him. Vash thinks for a moment he might be able to reason with it and then it flashes a message: MESS IDENTIFIED. ]

Me? Come on, isn't that a little much!? [ It's true but it doesn't have to say it!

NOW he's running away, but he's definitely not in top form yet, and this thing is already nipping at his coat tails. He could probably use a hand here. Or not, you can also just let him get pancaked and laugh about it. ]

PAPARAZZI

Hey, I need to take some pictures of beautiful people - do you know anyone like that?

[ Whoever this message is intended for (Wolfwood), it wasn't you, but you get it anyway. Hope you're not too offended..? ]

[ Sophia is not the kind of AI who can let someone get pancaked and laugh about it. Probably. She still has no memories pre-waking up in the trash, but surely when one is given the objective to "become humanity's companion", that must mean not laughing at unfortunate tall men with Ryuji hair, but Edgier.

Either way, there's a tiny figure in white darting towards him and the robot, flinging out... yo-yos? Yeah. Yo-yos. They hit the robot with a decisive THUNK, with enough force to rock it back a bit, though it's not anything particularly dramatic or life-saving. ]

I am intervening!

[ Hi. ]

[ Vash has never seen a yo-yo in his life but he's sure glad to see it now. Even if the robot doesn't stop, the brief pause is enough to give him a little bit of breathing room.

He flashes his tiny savior a smile. ] Thanks for intervening! [ He makes a little strangled sound as the robot redoubles its efforts, but at least he's pretty agile getting over the heaps of debris in his way.

He doesn't know for sure if the girl is going to follow him or leave him to it, but either way he's not planning to leave her anywhere near this thing's path. If she looks like she'll come with him, he gestures for her to follow and stays a pace or two behind her, but if she stays put, Vash will turn on his heel and stop beside her. ] Think you can help me keep its attention without letting it turn me into a pancake?

[ Sophia is absolutely staying put. And she thinks that's it, really, that the man will keep booking it, so she looks politely perplexed when he steps up to join her. Her yo-yos are at the ready, eyes flicking back and forth between him and the robot, but she visibly brightens at the mention of "help". Help! She can help!! She can be useful!!

She's kind of lightly bouncing from foot to foot, unwilling to stay completely still, it seems. ]

Understood! I'll assist you on this mission. There will be no alterations of your physical form into dessert items.

[ She. Maybe took him a tad too literally, but the point is that she's fine with helping to play distraction, so hooray?? ]

[ She's a little confused but she's got the spirit! Vash grins at her. ]

Okay - you keep your distance from it too. Team Not Pancake! [ He holds up a hand for a high-five even though he has no idea if she knows what a high five is.

He has to wonder whether she's got some pretty advanced technology going for her, or if she's not even human at all. He's still not even close to becoming accustomed to the idea that there are so many different kids of people around here.

Unfortunately for him, the big angry machine seems to have had enough time to recover itself before he can pry much further. Vash nods at his new ally before peeling off at a run again. If the situation was truly dangerous, he'd be a lot more weary, but as things stand he's having a good time playing robot keep-away and shouting over the sounds of rampant chaos: ] What's your name anyway?!

[ She does know what a high five is! Thanks mostly to the Phantom Thieves, but she'll cheerfully deliver one before they get back to running. She's keeping an eye out to make sure there are no hapless civilians wandering around who might get caught up in it, but it looks like Mysterious Blond Stranger managed to lead it well enough away that they just have to keep that up now.

But she tilts her head in his direction as she runs, then waves an arm over her head. ]

My name is Sophia! I'm humanity's companion! Who are you?

Nice to meet you, Sophia! [ Vash waves back, maybe a little less energetically, but with no less sincerity. ] What does that mean - humanity's companion?

[ Does it mean she's really not human? Vash's expression is all wide-eyed curiosity - when he isn't grimacing or trying to scramble over some debris. He's starting to realize he's overestimated himself - hopefully Sophia won't mind dealing with the robot when he needs a moment to catch his breath.

It's only belatedly that he adds: ] Oh - I'm Vash!

[ He's still struggling to get past the habit of trying to avoid giving people his name. ]

[ She won't mind at all. Acting as a distraction is what she promised him she'd do, after all. ]

It's very nice to meet you, Vash. [ Sincerely, because it's always nice to meet new people. ] But being humanity's companion I think means... helping humanity with any problems they might have? I haven't been able to really figure it out and I don't remember if I was given any explicit instructions on it... I just know that's my purpose.

[ So she'll do her best with it, though her best right now involves skidding to a halt and flinging out the yo-yos in a straighter line to try and trip up the robot this time. Whatever Vash is, he clearly needs to do things like. Well. Breathe. ]

[ Vash nods, understanding her uncertainty at least. Helping humanity is something that might seem simple, but it means something different every day, and he's not sure that anyone has an instruction or simple answer for that. Still, she reminds him more of his sisters than of himself; she's clearly very good at what she does, and he can see why humanity might need someone like her.

Though, he does wonder why she doesn't remember. Maybe it was a long time ago? ]

It sounds like something I'd like to do, too. I don't really have the answers either but... Maybe we can figure it out together?

[ You know, when he's not being chased by a giant robot.

Once he catches his breath, he can see they're in the home stretch; the hint of a wide green field appears between some of the rundown buildings. Pieces of rubble have been blown out into the field as well, and Vash is hoping that there's enough of it to keep the thing occupied out there until it dies down. ]

What are you talking about?

[She's grinning a shit-eating grin at him from across the scene. Maybe it's because she knows she can laugh about this situation with him, even if the memories are fake.]

We look exactly the same.

[ ET TU, RINGO?

Vash wilts, defeated. If nothing else, he feels a little better that it's her. ]

Only when someone's shooting at us. [ He gives her a wry little smile in return. ] Are you sure too late to start running?

Edited 2023-04-21 13:54 (UTC)

[Absolutely. She grins in response, nodding.]

Pretty sure. I mean, with the way I've seen you run, you could make it--but this is a lot better than our usual situations, right?

It's just some cameras and a script, that's all.

[ Vash nods, only a little reluctantly. He does actually prefer being shot (by a camera) than being shot at. And there is a free snack table if he makes it through this scene with her. ]

Just promise not to laugh when I try to pull off 'evil long lost twin.' [ Vash rubs the back of his neck. He supposes he'll have to do his best impression of his actual twin. ] You seem relaxed... Have you done anything like this before? I don't suppose you've got any tips?

[It's cute and endearing that he went straight for the evil long lost twin of the two roles.]

I'd never. [She absolutely would.]

But hmmm... nah! Never. Not even in the fake memories.

[she taps her chin thoughtfully with a finger, before she just shrugs.]

But trying new stuff is fun! And there's nothing to be embarrassed about. If the script sucks, that's on the writers, not on us.

[ He's not going to make her do that part - she's been so nice to him! Mostly.

Vash makes a sound that is uncannily reminiscent of a puppy whine, if only somehow softer and more pathetic. ] You're right I... I'm sure it'll be fun.

[ He seems a little reassured, at least. Then there's a shout for all quiet on set and Vash shoots her a wide-eyed look before the set lights come up with blinding intensity. Someone takes the script out of his hands and manhandles him to a his queue position.

Vash takes a deep breath and goes for it. ]

You thought you'd seen the last of me when you shoved me off the edge of that cliff, didn't you?! Don't worry, I've learned my lesson about trying to give you... a hand. [ He dramatically clenches his prosthetic hand for emphasis. He's sort of forgotten the line but he's doing his best to improvise. ] I thought nothing could separate us, but we're enemies now... sister.

[ Vash has only ever really "acted" for children who want him to participate in some elaborate game of pretend, so that's more or less the level of skill he's displaying here. ]

[He's doing great. She's so proud of him. Listen, he's going all in on it and that's all she could ever ask for!

So!

Ringo's going to go all in too. It's the least she can do--and also, it's fun and funny.]

Brother! [GASP...!!! She plants a hand to her chest. This is overacting at its finest.] I never--I never meant for us to be separated for so long.

[Ringo your character pushed him off a cliff.]

Please...! [... line??] Uh--don't forget all of the good times we had together!

[I can guarantee that's not the line.]

Like the time you pushed me off the cliff? That one? [ Vash has a sudden coughing fit that may or may not be him valiantly trying and somewhat failing not to laugh. ]

B-But I suppose you mean the other good times! Like, uh... [ Oh he has no idea what he's supposed to say here. What's a normal human developmental milestone?? ] Our first birthday! When we told our mom that the camera wasn't on and she thought she'd missed the whole thing...

[ You know, talking and playing pranks like a normal human 1-year old. ]

Or.. uh... [ Help him Ringo that's all he's got. ]

[ unfortunately(?) someone has amnesia after the storm, and when she sees a text, the safest thing is to assume that it's from someone she's supposed to know. it's embarrassing, but she should act natural, right? ]

yeah. me! ♡

[ there's a selfie that follows: Ruby winking and flashing a peace sign at the camera. ]

haha i'm kidding. we can go people-watch? i'm sure there are bound to be some good-looking people no matter where you are

Oh! I don't think we've met?

[ He sends back a selfie of him waving at the camera, just in case. He doesn't think he'd forget, but with memories being so strange around here... He's never really sure. ]

There's a quest I'm trying to finish... If you don't mind, I'd like to take your photo with a special camera. If you'd prefer not to, that's okay too! I'd still appreciate the company. :)

[ It's late when Wolfwood is skulking through the streets back toward Dodo House, a little unsteady in his step and rather annoyed with himself about it. (It's a trend today, the well of frustration, and bulk of it directed toward himself.) He wasn't expecting to be so... affected when he wandered out into the city for a drink. He'd helped himself to alcohol on more than one occasion back in No Man's Land, and each time the haziness had never lasted for very long. Whatever Conrad had done to his body had spared him prolonged periods of drunkenness, if nothing else.

But now his mind is still sluggish, frustrated and agitated from the days events. Enough so that he's craving another drink, if he's being honest, which he very rarely is, but paranoid enough to control himself.

He focuses instead on the fact that he's starving, hoping that the House will cough up some food for him despite the fact that it's way beyond regular meal times. He thinks it might, they've been repairing their relationship lately.

The thought of food is enough to bring a little energy back to his step, his drunken mind easily appeased by whatever thought comes floating through his mind first. Which makes it all the more sudden a pivot back to discomfort and panic when he spots a familiar head of blonde hair as he nears the House, stomach, previously eager for food, suddenly filled with ice.

In an attempt to flee, he makes for the side entrance that he isn't sure exists. Running right in front of Vash as he does so. ]

[ It seems like not a single day goes by without hearing about some new horrible incident with Nai. Vash has been doing his best to keep an eye on his brother, but he still needs to work and sleep at least some of the time. He probably should be eating. His Gate is no longer strong enough to keep him relatively functional, and it feels like everything is starting to fray. His eyes are itchy and red from the way he keeps having to rub away frustrated tears.

He wants to call Wolfwood, but he'd left the apartment without his phone, stupidly enough, and now the house keeps turning him in circles, back to the kitchen. Vash can't imagine trying to eat. He's busy picturing Wolfwood bleeding out somewhere alone, like any number of Nai's other victims - hands over his stomach, trying to hold himself together, slumped over the couch in his own apartment, maybe.

For the hundredth time, he starts talking to the house in the hopes that it will just listen to him: ]

I'll eat later. Please let me go. I need to find -- [ Vash's body moves before the thought has even fully formed - he practically clotheslines Wolfwood with how quickly his arm shoots out, grabbing the front of his shirt and dragging him back, pushing him up against the nearest wall. All of that anxious energy seems to crystalize for a moment; anger and fear and relief all intermingled at once. There are fresh tears blurring his vision so Wolfwood is little more than a dark smear against the wall but he doesn't care, right at that moment. ]

What were you thinking picking a fight with him? [ Vash's voice is so rough it nearly comes out as a growl. He shoves Wolfwood again, weakly, his grip already going slack on Wolfwood's shirt. All of that pent up energy is there and gone in a flash, but Vash hasn't let go, clinging to him instead of trying to hold him in place.

He knows exactly what Wolfwood was thinking. One of them could have died. Both of them could have died. If they had, there would only be one person to blame.

He should apologize. He should get on his knees and beg for forgiveness.

Instead, what he says is: ] Are you drunk?

[ On some level, Wolfwood knew that Vash would be mad once he inevitably discovered that Wolfwood had tried to kill his brother. Or rather, he knew that Vash would be sad about it, and that was fine. Vash was greedy with his grief, holding it closer to him than Wolfwood had Punisher, and as frustrating as it was, there was no way that he could live his life toeing the line of what might add another fracture to a heart broken a hundred times over already.

He doesn't expect to be grabbed so abruptly, more disoriented than he would usually be, and a little dazed as he looks back at Vash's distraught face, seeing the fear and relief there and comprehending none of it.

A dull throb burns in his shoulder where Knives had stabbed him, and he has the distant idea that he probably didn't do as great of a job "bandaging" the wound as he thought he it.

But the thought falls away as quickly as it came, and it's not long before his own anger rises up in his throat, hands rising up to shove Vash away from him. ]

You're dumber than I thought if you thought this was gonna go any other way.

[ His face is a snarl as he spits the words out in response, ignoring the question. He's still tired and disoriented, but the anger is as clear as ever. He's angry that Vash is angry, as if he expected Wolfwood to face the man that ruined his life and not put his murderous history to use. ]

Consider yourself lucky I didn't actually kill 'im.

[ He doesn't- he doesn't know what's going on, but he wouldn't put it past Vash's soft and bleeding heart to use whatever this is as an opportunity to fix whatever the hell is broken inside Knives. People are easiest to mould when they're weak, and even if he's still a monster at heart, Knives is weak right now.

Vash doesn't deserve to have that hope taken from him, but it makes him angry that Vash would even want it. After everything. ]

[ Vash lets go, lets Wolfwood push him back, but there's none of the usual flailing for balance - the few inches of ground he cedes are deliberate. ]

You didn't do that for me. [ Vash says, his voice already soft, without accusation. ] But thank you, Wolfwood.

[ He means it sincerely, not that he thinks it will bring either of them any comfort. He's not angry anymore, but he's still so damn tired.

Wolfwood and Nai are so alike in this way, and he can't even begin to explain it to either of them. He understands that they're afraid, that they're angry - in Wolfwood's case, rightfully so - but even Vash's seemingly infinite compassion isn't enough for him to back down in this moment. He can't just let this go. He can't just let them destroy each other. ]

Isn't it enough that you know you know that you can do it? That you don't have to be afraid of him? [ Vash steps right back into Wolfwood's space. ] You think you can just kill him and -- then what, Wolfwood? You throw away the life you could have here? Throw away the future for both of you? You're a coward. You're terrified to hope for anything better, and this is your excuse.

[ Like he had been hours ago, facing down a different brother, Wolfwood is suddenly possessed with the urge to hit Vash. Just to make him shut up and surrender whatever fantasy he has of reforming Knives or Wolfwood or both. ]

Don't call me a coward just 'cause you're too damn scared to admit your brother's beyond savin'. [ His voice lacks the volume of his prior aggression, controlled and spiteful. ] A future, while he's sleepin' down the hall? And what about when he goes crazy and makes this place his next genocidal project?

—Or do you promise not to let that happen? You plan on keepin' that one, unlike all the other promises you made?

[ He closes his eyes, leaning back against the wall, wearied from the alcohol and blood loss both, kept upright by the pounding of his heart and the adrenaline pumping through his veins.

It's a strange feeling; feeling in his core that he's right in his conviction that there can't be any peace while Knives is alive, but knowing too that Vash isn't wrong. He is a coward, and he doesn't want to bear the weight of Vash's expectations that Wolfwood could find hope and happiness here.

There only lies disappointment down that path. ]

And you know what, [ he continues, words slightly slurred, ] even if he doesn't go crazy, I'd still want him dead. There ain't no future here that'll ever replace what Conrad and him took from me.

[ He flinches, when Wolfwood asks that particular question, grief welling up in his chest like an open wound. Would he make a promise and then bury Wolfwood like had buried Rollo?

For a moment, he wants to be the person who, after seeing the blood on the floor and knowing who it belonged to, could have walked into Nai's room and matched the imprint of Wolfwood's hands around his throat until it was done. He understands why Wolfwood is angry that he isn't that person, because Vash is angry that he isn't, too. Even if Nai had been there with Wolfwood's cold body in his hands - he can't kill anyone again. He won't.

And maybe Wolfwood is right. Maybe he's a coward for that, too.

He swallows and looks away first. ]

You're right, we can't go back and fix the past. [ Vash says quietly, his voice steady even now. ] But there's still a future here, whether you want to admit it or not. I'm not going to give up on it.

[ He can smell blood, under the alcohol and cigarettes, but there's nothing he could do now that wouldn't aggravate the wound. He takes a step back, and then another. ]

Go to bed, Wolfwood.

[ Sometimes Wolfwood thinks it's a miracle that despite everything that he's done, and how much he's tired to erase "Wolfwood" to make room for "Punisher", he can still feel so much. He's aggravated and indignant that Vash is sending him off to bed like a misbehaving child, and wants to lash out again at him for it.

But he's relieved too. Relieved that despite everything that happened in July, Vash is still holding onto hope. That he could find that here, and maybe build a more peaceful life for himself.

It has nothing to do with Wolfwood, but he's glad for it nonetheless. Feels a little bit of relief that he honestly doesn't deserve to feel.

He pushes off the wall and starts in the direction of the dining hall, not having forgotten the hunger that he'd felt before this run. ]

Save your concern for someone else.

[ Vash lets him go. He doesn't really know if there's anything else he can do.

He stands there long after Wolfwood's footsteps have receded, then turns and heads toward what he hopes is the front door.

Maybe Wolfwood had the right idea about one thing. ]

[ OPEN ] - Catch-All for Vash

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